Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Bad Habits

I have one really bad habit that I wish I could stop.

I am kind of embarrassed to admit it but...





I chew my nails!

Not just my nails but the skin around them too. I am really ashamed of this habit and the way my fingers look. I will often try to hide them from other people and whenever I have to sign receipts I am conscious of people looking at them. They really look disgusting, the skin is always red and raw and often bleeding in places.

It's a habit that's always been with me. I tend to do it when I'm stressed or anxious or emotional or even bored. It was worse in my teenage years when I was at High School. All my nails were constantly chewed down low. They would often hurt and throb at night when I was trying to sleep. But the pain didn't stop me chewing them! Sometimes I wonder if this habit is some weird form of self harm behaviour - some sort of physical outlet to the stress and emotions I am feeling and can't deal with.

I've tried everything I can think of to stop but nothing seems to work. I've tried that bitter solution you put on your fingers, I've tried chewing gum, I've tried getting people to remind me when I'm chewing my nails, I've tried things for my hands to fiddle with and I've tried sheer will power. Will power works for a while and my nails will grow for a little while but all it takes is for another stressful situation to happen and I'm back to it again! I hate it. At the moment I'm in that 'in between stage'. Some of my nails still look fine but some not so good.

I would really, really like to stop chewing my nails now though so from this day forward I am making the pledge. It's in writing now so there's no going back! Any friends or family who see me chewing my nails feel free to remind me of this. Although I usually only do it when at home so Chris, it's up to you! ;)

Well, I've shared my bad habit with you all now, feel free to share yours!

2 comments:

Rebecca said...

Why not get yourself a really really expensive manicure and fake nails? Not really your style I know, but it might help to hinder the habit if it would mean burning money... just a thought. XX

Narelle said...

I did consider that...but I remember when I had fake nails done for my wedding they drove me mad! I had no sensations at the end of my fingers at all, typing on the computer and things like doing up buttons were impossible lol.

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